Mistake of Epic Proportions
by a DUMB girl WITH a COMPUTER
Summary: "I...told...you...to...pick...D Gray-man!" I yelled in between punches. "It...was...an...accident!" Sam said while dodging each punch. "You've fucked us both!" I growled at her, trying to catch her with an uppercut. She narrowly avoided my fist. "Calm down!" She pleaded. "No! What the hell are we gonna do in Kuroshitsuji? We can't train in a place like this!"


**ellowwww peoples! This fanfic originates from a strange dream that I had , I didn't want to wake up so I'm making it a fanfic! Yes, my logic making it into a is flawless, I know!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji, but I do own my oc's.**

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"I...told...you...to...pick... D Gray-man!" I yelled in between punches.

"It...was...an...accident!" Sam said while dodging each punch.

"You've fucked us both!" I growled at her, trying to catch her with an uppercut. She narrowly avoided my fist.

"Calm down!" She pleaded.

"No! What the hell are we gonna do in Kuroshitsuji!? We can't train in a place like this!"

I swung my fist again and was finally able to graze her jaw. She jumped back three meters before I could squeeze in another punch.

"They are going to DESTROY us in the battles next year!"

We were currently fighting in front of the Phantomhive mansion because of Sam's (incredibly fucking stupid and newbish) mistake.

"The text on that panel was small, it could have happened to anyone." she said frantically while blocking a kick that was aimed at her head.

She wasn't fighting back and I knew that she was just waiting for me to blow off some steam, but that made me even angrier.

I bumped up my speed to a more serious level and kicked her in the gut. She flew backwards into a tree before she could gather her bearings. A thin line of blood dripped past her lips.

So far I had restricted myself to 3 hits on her, but I swore to god that I was gonna grab a fistful of that pretty brown hair and cram it down her throat if she didn't shut that mouth of hers.

"A year Sam, a fucking YEAR is how long were gonna be stuck here! How are we going to fit into this plot line anyway!? There's no way in hell that I'm becoming a maid!" I yelled while trying to swipe a kick under her feet. She jumped just in time to avoid my leg.

I growled in frustration. Of all places, did it have to be Kuroshitsuji!? A world that was made for yaoi obsessed fan girls was not my ideal place for training to compete in multiple fights to the death.

I didn't know much about this world, I had only read a little bit of its summary and fanfiction because a past partner of mine had wanted to come here. After learning a little about it, I had flat out refused to waste kill points on a world like this and told her that we were going to the world 'Baccano' to gain immortality. Ironically, she died in that world. Luckily, I didn't.

Now I had this little screw up as a partner.

She wasn't immortal like I was because she was still clinging to that stupid mentality that the risk of death is what makes world jumping so fun.

'I swear, this girl!' I thought angrily.

She was so troublesome and a freaking hand full.

She really was hopeless...

I stopped trying to take Sam's head off as soon as I felt the anger drain from my body and my sense of logic take over. We really didn't have time for this.

I inspected my hands briefly to see how far 'The Gray' had progressed.

Only the pads of my fingers were tinted the dull color. Good, I had known it to spread much faster in some worlds.

I shook my head slowly.

"Let's just hurry up and go check out the main cast" I grumbled quietly.

Sam sighed in relief at being forgiven for her (idiotic) mistake.

"Sure thing, let's go do that." she agreed quickly, jumping at the chance to make me forget my anger towards her.

I started walking towards the mansion.

"Um, Darla." Sam said abruptly "I think...we need a different set of clothes."

I looked down at our attire and then pinched the bridge of my nose because I was really beginning to develop a migraine from all this stress.

We were dressed for D Gray-man, meaning we were wearing black and white with weapons strapped to our backs, which probably would make spying more difficult. Not for me, but for Sam.

I swear she had the stealth of a penguin, carrying weapons that jingled when she walked would make finding her easier than pointing out a black dot on a white sheet of paper.

I turned towards Sam "Y'know, other partners would have just let you die, kill points be damned. You are SO freaking lucky that you have me to put up with you." I told her. It was extremely rare for a partner let another partner die willingly, but it happened.

Kill points that are earned are doubled and automatically added to your partner's kill point count. Once you're partner dies, the kill points that they have earned in the OC battles are deleted from the system and your own kill point income is cut in half without the support of your partner who you cannot replace until the end of the year.

This system was meant to force partners to work together for their own good, even if they hated each other. A partner helped ensure that you didn't forget yourself while world hopping.

It would be incredibly stupid to kill your own partner, but Sam didn't point that out. She just grinned at me and said "I know."

She clapped her hands together "Alrighty then, let's go loot some clothes before the day is out and get to work before 'The Gray' makes its way!" Sam said cheerfully.

'The Gray' is a world time limit. Ever seen those people in the background of shojo? It's like that. If your whole body is consumed by the color gray, you lose your sense of self and fade away into the world that you're in, partner or not. The only way to avoid this is to become as tightly interwoven into the main plot of the world that you're in as quickly as possible.

My lips quirked up despite myself "Whatever, let's just go find some other mansion and get the clothes from there."

Sam grinned and said in a poor British accent "Indeed, my good fellow, indeed!"

I was full on smiling now "Shut up Sam.

What was I going to do with this fool?

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Sam's POV

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"Ow! That's not how you put it on, it's way too tight!" I gasped out.

My organs felt like they were gonna pop right out of my body because of the intense pressure.

"It's...supposed to feel like this." Darla grunted while tightening the corset some more.

Something audibly went Crack in my rib cage.

"Stop! Just stop...Jesus, please...stop." I panted.

"Fine, you big baby." She huffed.

How did women put up with this form of brutal torture!? It was like trying to fit a pickle into a keyhole. I stumbled over to a nearby chair and collapsed onto it.

The corset refused to let me breathe properly or even bend over.

I turned towards Darla who was fiddling with her own corset "Take...this death contraption off of me." I rasped.

She glanced down at me and then smirked "No."

"Please...can't...breathe!" I begged. Darla shook her head slowly, "Think of this as a punishment for your incompetence." she said dryly.

Wasn't that kick into the damned tree enough? I wasn't freaking indestructible like her! If my ribs break, they break!

'Damn that freakishly small transportation panel' I cursed silently in my mind.

It was an honest mistake, the name Kuroshitsuji and D Gray-man were literally RIGHT next to each other in small digital print. I'm sure it's happened to plenty of people...right?

"So," I said after we were done dressing up in some rich ladies outfits "What's our game plan?"

Darla immediately started to give me her infamous silent death glare.

"Well, we had a game plan. We had a really good game plan...for D Gray-man, NOT for Kuroshitsuji" She said slowly as if speaking to a child.

Ah, she was still angry.

I pursed my lips "True, true, let's start brain storming then" I suggested enthusiastically.

Darla rolled her those green eyes of her's at me.

At least she wasn't trying to kick my ass anymore.

"Listen Sam, I know I said that I didn't want to become a maid and all, but...well, I can't think of any other way that we can fit in the story line. I mean, this is a Victorian age. Women don't really have a lot of rights in this time period."

I slumped down onto the rather expensive looking chair and groaned dramatically "Uuuuuugggghhhh, am I gonna have to act prissy? Cause' I'll tell you right now, that's not gonna fly with me."

"We don't really have a choice in the matter." She said while running a comb through her short black hair.

"Ooh ooh, I have an idea!" I shouted as I reached down to snatch up my old D Gray-man clothes. I pulled out my dagger from the pocket and held it out to Darla.

"Stab me in the gut." I said seriously.

Darla looked at me weirdly and shut her eyes as if in pain. She rubbed the sides of her temple. Probably because of one or her migraines.

"...and why, Sam, would I stab you?" she asked flatly.

I grabbed one of her hands from her head and wrapped it around the dagger handle.

"Don't you get it!? All we have to do is stab me in the gut and then show up on their front door and say that I need medical attention stat and then they'll be forced to take care of me or else I'll die! It's fool proof! You can't NOT help a damsel in distress if you're a gentlemen, and the Victorian age is filled to the brim with gentlemen, right!? Just be sure not to graze anything vital and I'll be fine!" I was so excited that I spoke faster than my brain.

I didn't see anything wrong with this plan.

Darla however, winced.

"Oh, fuck, my head hurts," she groaned, then turned to me "I can't...I don't even know where to start with this one...Jesus Sam. Stab you, really? You're not serious are you? You realize that this is not like the OC battles where you can just heal and regenerate limbs by paying kill point's right? What happens if it gets infected?" Each one of Darla's questions were things that I had neglected to think about.

My excitement slowly began to deflate.

"...well, when you put it like that, of course it sounds bad, but...I don't want to be a maaaaaid." I whined.

"Me neither Sam, me neither" she agreed.

We were silent for a while.

I glanced at my hand. 'The Gray' had progressed up to my knuckle bone. I grimaced, "What are we going to do Darla?" I asked her solemnly.

She hummed while in deep thought.

"Well" she said "I guess we can always be villains."

I immediately bolted up out of my seat.

"THAT'S FUCKING BRILLIANT!" I shouted.

Darla hissed "Shut up! My head is killing me!"

"Sorry, but Darla you're brilliant! I can't believe I didn't think of that! I totally forgot we could do that, I mean you told me you did it before in Fullmetal Alchemist didn't yo-" I clamped a hand over my mouth when I realized my mistake.

Crap, I mentioned THAT anime.

Darla was now sitting quietly with a dazed expression on her face. Probably remembering her old lover boy.

Darla had gone to the FMA world before she was my partner so I didn't have much details about it, but she had told me that she had once played the villain in FMA and that she was never going back to that world ever again. No matter how much I begged.

I had asked if it was because of a boy and she had thrown me into a wall (which is the same thing as saying 'yes').

She refused to talk about it with me.

"Sorry Darla." I mumbled.

She seemed to snap out of her daze when I said her name.

"Yeah, like FMA." she agreed quietly.

I got up out of my chair and walked over to Darla. I patted her on the head in an effort to cheer her up.

She laughed at my attempt like I knew she would, then she sat me down back in the chair to comb my hair.

I frowned.

I wasn't lucky like Darla, she had easily combed hair that was short and wispy, while mine was long and spiraled in a way that made it easy for me to get a dread lock in the back of my head.

I bit back a cry of pain when I felt the comb tug at my hair roughly. Darla seriously needed to learn how to be gentle!

"Darlaaaaa, start from the bottom, then work your way to the top." I suggested. Darla scoffed "Do you want to do it instead?" She asked me.

I shut my mouth.

No matter how hard I tried, I could never comb the back of my head properly like Darla could. Whenever I try to do it myself I always end up with one big knot in my hair.

"That's what I thought." She said smugly.

I could hear the smile in her voice and it made me smile.

"This is good. We have a goal, now all we need to do is come up with a plan." Darla said while ripping the comb through my hair. I winced long and hard.

I hoped she would she would forgive me soon.

When Darla was finished combing my hair and styling into a high ponytail I jumped up excitedly and clapped my hands "Finally! Now let's go put on our coats and then go scheme while shopping for more clothes! We can come up with something while were doing that!" I cheered while pulling Darla towards the closet.

The lady that used to live here had a large collection of clothes in her closet but it was hard to find something to wear because the woman was a totally different size from us.

Thankfully, I was still able pick out a giant fluffy black fur coat that reached my ankles and practically buried my head it's softness.I loved it. It felt like I was being nuzzled by a thousand little bunnies. The dress I had on underneath was dark purple and black with lacy designs. I felt like a classy bitch.

Darla went for the less fluffy and more elegant white feather coat that went well with her long white dress. Unlike me though, she was weaing a pair white high heels, white gloves that reached her elbows, and carried a red fan that was totally out of place with so much white.

Darla would probably never admit it, but she absolutely LOVED dressing up in pretty clothes. I was pretty sure she was a closted diva.

When we were fully dressed I skipped happily out the bedroom door only to remember what was laying outside of it when it was too late.

I made a face when I accidentally stepped in a puddle of blood.

"Ewwwww Darla, why can't you ever take anyone out neatly?" I asked while eyeing the dead lady whose head was cracked open and smeared all over the wall.

Darla chuckled "If no bodily fluids get onto me while I'm taking someone out, then I consider it a clean kill." she told me while lifting up her new silk dress and avoiding the puddles of...'Bodily fluids'

Yuck.

One of these days Darla and I were going to have to have a long serious talk about her 'tendencies'.

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**So, yeah, this is where I basically woke up and immediately tried to go back to sleep to see what please!**

**happens next. Didn't work, but I still plan on continuing this fanfic! The dream was just an inspiration for me to write my first Kuroshitsuji story! Tell me if you like it or not :)**

**Review**


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